Anger Within

He is in his 40's. The prime of his life assured. Invincible , on top of the world, that was a few months ago. A few months ago when he first noticed that nagging cough which would not quit. That increased shortness of breath. Finally, reluctantly he sought medical attention. Test were done and a short time later he learned that the the little nagging cough which irritated him was a giant. A giant called Cancer. Lung cancer which has now spread to multiple places throughout his body. Cancer which he will probably battle for the rest of his life. He has no hair. His bald head glimmers in the glow of the bright exam light. Angrily he yells out. Yells at his family, the nurses and anyone else within close proximity. Every touch brings pain as his skin is sensitive to the slightest touch. His pain level increased and unrelieved by even the strongest medications. He is mad. He comes across as a mean bully. Some of the nurses say that they don't want to go into his room. He is so verbally abusive. He screams out at everything. He demands water, He demands food, He demands attention. He is what the medical field would call non compliant. I step back briefly from the obvious and realize I would be mad to. It is one of the only things left which he can control. It is now that I realize I am saying a small faint prayer. Lord help me to see through his anger and be sensitive to his loss. Help me to listen and to be what he needs at this time. Help me be able to see through the anger, the anger within.